A coaching conversation about research rabbit holes, mental stimulation and the gap between thinking and doing.
What ADHD Overthinking Can Look Like
A client described in a coaching session his tendency to get utterly absorbed in mentally stimulating activities, such as researching obscure topics online or jumping from one fascinating idea to the next, with no real-world outcome at the end.
The mental equivalent of spinning your wheels: satisfying in the moment, but ultimately going nowhere. Something that can provide a quick hit of satisfaction but, in this context, is seen as self-serving and notably unproductive.
The client described spending hours reading Wikipedia or chasing new knowledge, only to realise afterwards that, while his mind felt busily engaged, nothing tangible had been achieved. His metaphor to describe this behaviour was ‘cognitive masturbation’.
For many with ADHD, this kind of cognitive overdrive is a double-edged sword. It can feel energising and even rewarding in the moment, but often leads to exhaustion, disappointment, and a nagging sense that precious time and energy have been frittered away.
What the client is describing is 'cognitive impulsivity', a recognised aspect of ADHD where the mind is drawn into stimulating but ultimately unhelpful pursuits. The result? Burnout, frustration, and a sense of underachievement. Side orders of guilt and shame, maybe?
How a Metaphor Can Make the Pattern Clearer
What’s especially powerful about metaphors is their ability to capture complex experiences in a way that’s instantly relatable. When clients use metaphors during coaching calls, they’re not just being colourful, they’re finding a language that makes their inner world visible.
This can be a turning point in coaching, allowing both client and coach to step back, laugh, and see the pattern for what it is. Once the habit is named, it becomes easier to spot, discuss, and, crucially, to change.
Metaphors are more than just clever turns of phrase; they are tools for self-understanding. They help clients explain challenges that might otherwise feel slippery or hard to pin down.
Recognising the Gap Between Thinking and Doing
For this client, his metaphor shines a light on the difference between activity and productivity, and opened up a conversation about setting boundaries, managing energy, and choosing activities that genuinely move life forward rather than just providing fleeting mental stimulation.
So, next time you find yourself lost down a rabbit hole of Wikipedia articles or compulsively researching something that doesn’t really matter, you might pause and ask: am I feeding my curiosity, or just giving my mind a bit of a tickle?
Sometimes, the right metaphor is all it takes to change the story, and the outcome.
Metaphors come up a lot in coaching. You know the way that you try to describe that ‘thing’, whatever it is, to other people so they get some sense of what you’re alluding to? Maybe you wonder if they actually get it but secretly think daft. It’s not. It’s incredibly valid. Just so you know.
If you want to find the meanings behind your metaphors, feel free to book a call.